A Woman’s Best Security

A lot of women ask how they will know if the man they are supporting won’t kick them to the curb once he becomes rich and has power.   Well honestly you won’t know.

A man with no money will always be humble but it’s after they have gotten power and money that you will know how humble they are. The same applies to women. A woman will always be well behaved and mannered once you support her financially but her true character is known once she becomes financially independent.

In my opinion I’ll say have a limit and time frame to support anyone, just like men now feel safer supporting a woman they are married to, women should also learn to support a man they are married to more.

You can support before marriage but your major support should be to a man you are married to. If you are going to support a man for ten years please let at least 7 years be in marriage not in a relationship. It’s for your own security.

And yes you can support a man to greatness and he’ll pay you back with infidelity and other heart wrenching hurts, the same goes for women.

You can support a woman to the peak of her career and she can still be unfaithful or she will suddenly realize that she cannot marry an uneducated man not up to the level of education she has attained with your help and support. So the best advice I can give is grow alongside the man or woman you are supporting.

Don’t be looking for a job for a man and you are unemployed. Look for a job for yourself as well. Just because a man is supposed to be the bread winner doesn’t mean you should as a woman remain unemployed.  

What will be will be so no point watching the clouds or you won’t plough, the Bible puts it very clearing that he who watches the clouds won’t plough meaning that if you keep wondering what will happen if you do a certain good deed you would not make progress.

So while supporting a man with vision and a plan, also be upgrading yourself. A lot of women make the mistake of supporting a man neglecting themselves.

It’s better to grow alongside a man. If he abandons you, you can nurse your wounds and move on and not end up empty handed.

Don’t be looking for a job for a man and you are unemployed. Look for a job for yourself as well. Just because a man is supposed to be the bread winner doesn’t mean you should as a woman remain unemployed.  

I read about a lot of women sending in posts to social media asking members of groups to pray to God to bless the men in their lives so they can come and marry them but won’t offer a similar prayer for themselves for God to bless them with jobs too so they can contribute meaningfully.

Even as a married woman why do you think you don’t need a job? You need a job too so you can support the family.

As a single woman while you pray to God and try to make connections for a man in your life to get a job please also make connections for yourself. It’s not a crime if you are gainfully employed or run a business too.

It’s not a crime to pay for some items for your marriage ceremony. You don’t have to pay for your bride price or things on your marriage list but you can pay for your clothes or the food or the decoration or you can sponsor the gifts you and your husband will give to guests who graced your occasion.

Even if you are supporting a man through school and you are just a secondary school certificate holder does it make any sense to you? What does it take to upgrade yourself as well so you can both grow together?

Yes you can do all that and the man will still leave you for someone else but in all honesty you will feel a little better if you upgraded yourself alongside someone who you upgraded who left you for someone else, than if you never made any progress upgrading yourself and growing.

This is also applicable to men, the meet a woman and pay her way through school to a master’s degree but never do the same for themselves. After all is said and done the woman says you are no longer her standard and it really hurts.

So in summary upgrade yourself alongside someone you are supporting because It just makes no sense praying for someone else neglecting your own self.

They best advice I can give to a woman supporting a man is to upgrade herself as she helps a man upgrade too and that’s the best protection a woman can give herself.

Treasure Ezuruike.